Boobies.
August 26, 2009 On August 23rd, our neighbors down south celebrated "National Go Topless Protest Day."
As far as I know, the Canadian provinces of Ontario, Saskatchewan, and British Columbia ruled that women going topless in public was not a criminal act of indecency. I assume that since these rulings (which took place in the late 90's), more provinces have followed suit. That being said, the fight to go topless isn't in my radar, nor is it an issue that seems to grapple my Canadian peers. Which is cool, 'cause instead of worrying about feeling the cool breeze on our tits, we can focus on other things.
Like rape statistics.
The official gotopless.org website cites:
How are we helping men? GoTopless is also committed to helping men differentiate between nudity and sexuality. If the presence of a topless woman in public triggers a sexual impulse, it can easily be controlled in the same way men control themselves when they see a woman wearing a mini skirt or revealing ample cleavage. Men manage to appreciate these things while still showing respect! Choosing consciousness above hormones leads to a peaceful, respectful society providing additional freedom and beauty.
Trinity and Saharah (left) protest the right to maximize their noble and natural financial investments. Mavis (third from the left), who has not worn a bra since 1976, claims that despite her breasts falling below her belly button, the freedom to go topless far outweighs the chronic upper back pain she now endures.
Sounds peachy. I can see it now:
"Yo, brah, check out those set of hooters!"
"Now hold up, Chad. A woman's breasts are part of her exterior temple, no different than an arm or a leg, except that breasts provide nourishment to feed our young. They are not objects to be ogled over, or rated on a scale from one to ten, but natural symbols of femininity that deserve our respect."
"I am sorry. You're right. Have I mentioned how much I love babies?"
And then a unicorn saunters by in a valley of rainbows.
I don't buy the idea that women going topless will free North Americans from their sexual repression. Our culture is obsessed with fame and plasticity, images and polished exteriors, a prototype of what beauty is and the chase to conquer that beauty, whether it's obtaining it ourselves, or simply exploiting someone else who has it. That is the root of our sexual repression, and if women going topless was to become a social norm in these parts of the world, that sexual repression would still be there, which is demonstrated to perfection on gotopless.org.
Because obviously it's detrimental to our fight for equality that twelve year old girls be saved from the sight of overweight, middle aged men, but hot women with double D implants? Finally, equality will be ours!!
When I last visited Saskatoon, my best friend and I sat on the riverbank and watched a shirtless, middle aged man jog passed and my best friend commented as to how women should have the same liberty. In retrospect, I guess the women of Saskatchewan do. As I glanced over at my best friend's athletic figure, petite breasts standing at attention, I wondered what it would be like if women going topless was a commonly accepted social mores.
I imagine what it would be like to pop into my parents' place and see my mother gardening in the backyard while sporting a tilly hat and a pair of free floatin' boobies. Or giving topless grandma a bear hug after a lengthy absence. Or the immense joy brought to our local pedophiles at the sight of an eleven year old girl playing in the park with her developing rose buds soaking up the summer sun. Best of all, we could smile and laugh when a passerby gets hit in the eye with breast milk, and then we could hold hands and sing Kumbaya and watch for more unicorns.
So lets say that the majority of women did let their boobies jiggle in public on warm, summer days. Would the everyday exposure of breasts, and I don't mean Halle Berry's rack in a Blockbuster, but real boobies-- stretch marked, saggy, asymmetrical, nipples post breastfeeding, breasts that lived through the Vietnam war-- weaken the perception of them as mere sexual objects? Or would men continue to perceive breasts as a sexual wonder? Would they walk through the street tripping over themselves at the sight of exposed breasts? And due to the lack of blood to the brain, would women completely take over the world and substitute men with dildo factories and semen distribution?
Ideally I would like to live in a world rid of Girls Gone Wild and men giving women beads to flash their boobies, but I'd also like to live in a world where men between the ages of twenty-five and thirty-five do not act like they are seventeen. I admit that I kind of like the fact that when I show cleavage my boyfriend's face is shoved in it, like my breasts are a chocolate mousse dessert that radiates decadence. I like the fact that when I am intimate with a man, my breasts are a source of sexual attraction, like a mystery only to be exposed to those I hand select. If breasts actually were perceived as just an arm or a leg, I wonder if I would miss that personal aspect to them.
As much fun as it sounds to have my cats bat at my hanging breasts like cheap toys from China while I bend over to tie my shoes, I still have trouble ignoring the physiological difference between men and women's breasts. As in women have them and men don't. And while I do think that it's unjustified for women to be arrested or fined for being seen bare breasted in public, I just don't perceive my ability to walk down the street with my breasts out as a real achievement for the women's movement.
Knah, I just don't.
feminism, social issues, women
Reader Comments (7)
It's actually amazing how bad most women look topless.
Haha. I know. The majority of breasts look about as awkward as penises.
Torr,
Far bigger issues out there than this I guess. Most men look like shit without a shirt, present company excluded.
As for rape, sexual assault, and other crimes against women, both physical and social, does any thinking person think those who commit these crimes give a damn about symbolism? These are crimes about displaying absolute power through the process of degradation and or brute strength. Those who commit them are callous about laws that can put them away for life, or get the death penalty. Rights mean nothing, symbolism means nothing. Those who believe any different are simply deluding themselves. Right now all over your provinces I GUARANTEE there are no rapists or whatever saying DAMN, I might have to stop doing this if women have the PRIVILEGE to go topless. (Note it's not a right, George Carlin can describe rights much better than I can).
I'll give you a funny real life example of the practicality of what I said above. I noted anti Violence anti anything lady in my old area says if we just take the time to talk then anyone can be converted to a functional member of society. Ie show kindness, explain to them it's not their fault, that she's willing to help set things straight and all. Well guess what? The day before she wants to go to one of the worst areas of Detroit she calls me up and asks if I'll escort her! I'm like uh why, I have no reason to go there, I don't give a shit about those people and to tell you the truth I'm not worried that anyone is going to be violent to me. She says EXACTLY, I need a good body guard in case I run into a psychopath or sociopath. I laughed and said no thank you.
See my point?
I love you Torr :)
MMBop
Steven Seagal,
HAHAHA. Don't think I missed the comment about you without a shirt. This is why I call you Dalton, Mr. Seagal.
Completely agree with you. People who commit those crimes are not even in the same realm of thought. It's simply laughable. I don't buy the politically correct notion that everyone is inherently good and just needs to be guided in the right direction. Like you said, symbolism and rights mean nothing to people like that. You should know, as you are the head bouncer of an incredibly rough bar called the Double Deuce.
Hilarious example you gave, and proves the point well. Glad you said no!
Love you, Dalton.
Torr,
LOL I didn't think I'd be able to slip the shirt comment by you but I tried!
You're simply going to love this, the slightly vapid lady I've taken out a couple times truly showed her brain might be nature's perfect vacuum. Last night before we went out I was reading what you just posted and getting a laugh out of it. She wanted to see what I was laughing at, As you know I'm usually extremely private but since it's a public blog I figured what the hell. First she said HEY I didn't know your real name was Steven!! I'm like uh it's not it's an inside joke and she says it to get a rise out of me. Then the real masterpiece comes, "YOU'RE REALLY A BOUNCER AT A BAR CALLED THE DOUBLE DEUCE? WHERE IS IT? YOU SHOULD TAKE ME SOMETIME, I THINK BOUNCERS ARE HOT!!" I came down with the 7 minute version of the Swine Flu and sent her on her way.
My screening process seems to have some faults in it princess.
Love you Torr,
MMBop (NOT STEVEN SEAGAL!)
As long as it is for a noble cause and people are expressing their rights for a reason they think is right, then why not? This helps people express what they believe in while others can't help but be thankful that there had been recent medical breakthroughs to make our lives even better.
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