Dear Potential Employer,
I'm a recent University graduate interested in gaining employment through your company--not because I actually want to work there, but because I need to feed myself, pay rent, and nourish my retail addiction.
I have strong organizational skills and the ability to work independently. In fact, I hate working with other people. I hate two faced / ass kissing co-workers, and I sure as hell hate inconsiderate customers who thrive on meaningless confrontation.
I have a liberal arts degree with a major in sociology and a minor in psychology. My university experience has instilled me with problem solving skills, perseverance, and a deeper understanding of work place exploitation and the importance of federal and provincial labour laws.
My work experiences are comprised of various tasks in which I worked independently, as a team player, and as an employee of business. These experiences have left me with a heightened annoyance with bureaucratic inefficiency and a life long feeling of disloyalty to companies and their hierarchal pyramids.
I have a bad attitude and often dress inappropriately. I have enclosed a resume for your review and would appreciate meeting with you to discuss how my qualifications could benefit your company.
I can be reached at (***) ***-****.
Sincerely, Lindsay Jo 6.0